I went to a funeral Saturday morning. The mother of one of my former students died of cancer; she was 43, her daughter is 12. It’s never easy to go to these…to experience grief such as the loss of one’s parent or child.
I think books help assuage the pain. I think they help us learn how to grieve by viewing a character we care about, but don’t love. As we read the interactions, the emotions, the growth of those left behind in the pain process, we are better able to cope with our own.
Such is the case with Goldengrove. It is a beautifully written book. A book which touches me to the core because it’s so easy for me to feel alone when I grieve, just as Nico does when her sister, Margaret, dies.
The sisters are floating on Mirror Lake together, casually rowing and talking, when Margaret makes a salute, dives into the water, and never comes out again alive. Nico, along with her parents and Margaret’s boyfriend, Aaron, cope with their grief as we carefully observe their raw emotions.
Nico’s father becomes lost in writing his book while he and his daughter work at the family’s bookstore, Goldengrove. Nico’s mother loses her appetite for food, but not for the medications she takes for arthritis pain. Aaron, perhaps worst of all, makes Nico into her sister in his mind. Which she, at first, is willing to accept just to have some contact with him.
This is essentially a story of Nico; not only of her grief, but of her growing up. The age of thirteen is such a tender age in any circumstance, let alone the loss of one’s dearest sister. I could so empathize with how carefully Nico’s character was portrayed; the searching, the awkwardness, the confusion of being an adolescent which is so difficult to endure. It is only compounded by her thinking of the issues death raises:
How strange that my father was writing the book about the end of the world, when I was the one who believed that it was going to happen. I thought about the cult members waiting to be zoomed up into the sky. They should have been more patient. Because now they were there, or somewhere. But not all together. Maybe they’d joined the robed angels in the Sienese orchard paradise. Maybe they’d been sent to hell for trying to get a free pass so they could spend eternity with all their loved ones, instead of losing them, one by one. I wondered how they’d really felt on the night they went home. Maybe some of them liked their lives and didn’t want to leave them.” (p. 154)
But, Nico comes through admirably. She lets us know that we can do it: suffer, grieve, and come out whole on the other side.
I felt myself slip out of my skin and become that girl watching her sister dive into the water. I lost myself in the time before, and in that innocent landscape, until the spell was broken by a museum guard, shouting.
He was speaking a foreign language, but I understood. He was saying I’d gotten too close. I’d let the current pull me. I’d allowed myself to drift into that hushed and watery border zone where we live alongside the dead. I was grateful to him for calling me back and reminding me where I belonged, in the clamorous, radiant, painfully beautiful kingdom of the living. (p. 275)
Francine Prose’s TLC Book Tours TOUR STOPS:
Tuesday, September 22nd: Book Magic
Wednesday, September 23rd: Eclectic Book Lover
Thursday, September 24th: The Bluestocking Society
Thursday, October 1st: A Sea of Books
Monday, October 5th: A High and Hidden Place
Tuesday, October 6th: Books on the Brain
Wednesday, October 7th: S. Krishna’s Books
Thursday, October 8th : Book Chatter and Other Stuff
Tuesday, October 13th: Caribousmom
Wednesday, October 14th: Literate Housewife
Thursday, October 15th: The 3 R’s: Reading, ‘Riting, and Randomness